Boundaries During the Holidays

Setting boundaries during the holidays.

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration. However, for many people, it can also be a time of stress, overwhelm, and exhaustion. The pressure to attend events, participate in traditions, and meet societal expectations can take a toll on mental and emotional well-being. That is why it is crucial to set boundaries during the holidays.

Setting boundaries is an act of self-care. It involves recognizing and prioritizing one’s own needs, protecting mental and emotional well-being, and maintaining healthy relationships. 

One aspect is the need to differentiate between what we think we “should” do (“shoulding” all over ourselves) and what truly brings us joy. Megan mentions the internal struggle of wanting to spend time with her children but questioning whether the activities they engage in are enjoyable for the whole family. This dilemma prompts her to examine their traditions and determine which ones serve the memories and experiences they desire, and which ones they are simply going through the motions for.

By examining our traditions and questioning their purpose, we can make conscious choices about what activities to engage in during the holiday season. This allows us to prioritize the events and traditions that bring us joy and create meaningful memories, while letting go of those that do not align with our values or preferences. It is essential to remember that it is okay to let go of traditions that no longer serve us or bring us happiness. We “should” not feel obligated to continue them simply because they are expected or have been done in the past. We “could” do it how we have done it in the past, or we could do it differently. What are the “Rainbow of Options”?

Another important aspect of setting boundaries is the impact of our attitude and energy on ourselves and those around us. She emphasizes the importance of being aware of the nonverbal communication we send when we force ourselves to participate in activities we do not enjoy. When we are not fully present or enthusiastic, it affects the overall atmosphere and energy of the event. By acknowledging our true feelings and choosing not to participate in activities that do not bring us joy, we can avoid draining ourselves and zapping the energy from the room.

It is important to be honest with ourselves and others about our boundaries. It is okay to change our minds, even at the last minute, and prioritize our well-being. She encourages listeners to ask for space or time alone if needed, without feeling guilty or obligated to attend events or engage in activities that do not align with their current needs. By communicating our boundaries honestly and respectfully, we allow ourselves the freedom to prioritize self-care and create a holiday season that is more aligned with our individual needs and desires.

Setting healthy boundaries is important.

Setting healthy boundaries is important in all aspects of life, including during the holiday season. One of the main reasons why setting boundaries is crucial is to prioritize our own needs. Megan mentions that it is essential to consider our own feelings and emotions when making decisions. It is not selfish to prioritize our own happiness and well-being. By setting boundaries, we can ensure that we are taking care of ourselves and not sacrificing our own needs for the sake of others.

Communication is also a key component of setting healthy boundaries. Megan mentions the importance of being honest and open about our boundaries. By communicating our needs and limitations, we can avoid resentment and misunderstandings. It is important to own our feelings and communicate them to others, especially when it comes to parenting. By being transparent with our children about our own emotions and limitations, we can teach them the importance of setting boundaries and taking care of themselves.

Take responsibility for your choices.

Taking responsibility for our choices is an important aspect of setting boundaries. It requires acknowledging that we have control over our decisions and actions, and that we are responsible for the consequences that arise from them. Megan and Elizabeth discuss how parents need to take responsibility for the choices they make regarding their children’s activities and schedules. The encourage parents to be intentional about what they can physically do and not be afraid to say no or set limits.

They also touch on the importance of taking responsibility in relationships with parents. They mention the guilt and feelings that can arise when trying to balance the demands of visiting or calling parents. They highlight the need for open communication and assertiveness in expressing one’s limitations and boundaries. By taking responsibility for their choices, individuals can actively work towards finding a balance that works for them and their parents.

Ultimately, taking responsibility for our choices means recognizing that we have agency in our lives. It means acknowledging that we have the power to make decisions that are in our best interest and that align with our values and needs. By taking responsibility for our choices, we can create a life that is authentic and fulfilling. It allows us to prioritize our well-being and establish healthy boundaries that promote healthy relationships and self-care.

Listen to this episode HERE!